How to Build Confidence in Your Teenage Daughter

Wondering how to build confidence in your teenage daughter? Check out these nine ways you can help boost her confidence right now!

If you are wondering how to build self-confidence in your teenage daughter, you are not alone.

For many teenage girls, adolescence is filled with never-ending self-doubt, body image struggles, and feeling insecure in their abilities.

In this article, we will discuss the role parents play in raising self-confident girls, as well as share nine ways you can help your daughter build more confidence now.


Why Self-Confidence is Important for Your Teenage Daughter

Self-confidence gives girls the ability to tackle difficult challenges.

A girl with high self-confidence is more likely to pursue exciting opportunities, speak up for herself and others, and develop a high level of resiliency.


The Role of Parents in Building Self-Confidence 

Your daughter is always watching and learning from how you behave.

As a parent, you have the unique opportunity to influence her confidence level by modeling the behavior you want to see.

You also have the power to limit influences that may be damaging to your daughter’s confidence, including excessive social media use.

Choosing an all-girls school for your daughter may also help her build more confidence. In an all-girls environment, students feel free to try new activities and be themselves without any judgement, fear, or gender-stereotypes.

Moreover, an all-girls environment often leads to the formation of healthy female friendships where girls lift each other up, which gives a big boost to their self-confidence.


How to Build Confidence in Your Teenage Daughter

Model confidence

If you want to build confidence in your teenage daughter, you first have to be confident in yourself. Your teen will learn the most about confidence based on what you do. 

If you frequently make critical statements about your body or your abilities, your daughter may start modeling the same behavior.

Try to limit negative self-talk in front of your daughter.  Instead, offer examples that demonstrate your braveness or when you’ve accomplished something important.

Encourage diversity in activities and interests

Encourage your teenage daughter to explore new horizons by joining a new club, taking part in volunteer work, or finding a part-time job.

Consider exploring new activities ⁠such as joining a robotics club or playing team sports.

Trying new activities and discovering hidden talents will help her see she’s more than capable of overcoming difficult challenges.

Embrace a growth mindset 

Teenage girls who struggle to master a skill may conclude that they are failures—losing self-confidence as a result.

Alternatively, show your daughter how to embrace a growth mindset by balancing self-acceptance with self-improvement. 

In this Harvard Business Review, Carol Dweck suggests that individuals who believe their talents can be developed (through hard work, good strategies, and input from others) have a growth mindset. They tend to achieve more than those with a fixed mindset (those who believe their talents are innate gifts). 

Talk to your daughter about your weaknesses and how you’ve worked to improve them.

She needs to understand that it’s possible to accept her flaws while striving to grow and become better.

Help her gain new skills

Encourage your daughter to pinpoint areas in which she would like to improve.

Then, sit down and brainstorm ways you could achieve this goal together. 

For example, if she is struggling in a math class, would getting a tutor help? 

Perhaps you could sit down together for an hour after school to work on her homework? Or talk to her teacher to ask for additional support?

Encourage self-compassion

Consider helping your daughter to recognize that sometimes, no matter how hard we try, things won’t go our way. 

It’s important that your daughter knows that’s okay⁠—and that failure isn’t final.

When something doesn’t go well, ask your daughter to imagine she’s talking to her best friend. 

How would she treat them if they failed at something like this? Ask her to treat herself the same way.

Make her feel helpful and valued

Allow your daughter to assist you with an important task or a decision. Don’t rush her through the process. 

Let her find answers to her own questions and come to her own conclusions.

This will help your daughter develop confidence in her abilities and decision-making skills, as well as make her feel like a valued member of the family.

Ask for her advice

It’s important that your teenage daughter knows adults are not all-knowing—that we make mistakes too.

Ask your daughter for advice on a small decision, or talk to her when you are facing a setback.

This form of communication will help her feel heard and valued, while normalizing the idea of failure being a part of life.

Limit media usage

Magazines and social media are filled with images and stories that may be very damaging to a young girl’s confidence.

Talk to your daughter about the reality behind the images she sees on social media. Consider helping her to recognize that much of what is portrayed on social media is a result of image editing.

You can also set rules regarding social media usage⁠. For example, no scrolling through Instagram in bed at night or while spending time with family.


Why Choose Marlborough

Marlborough is exclusively devoted to the education of young women. 

Weaving together engineering, digital arts, robotics, media, academic research, and entrepreneurship, the Shari and Ed Glazer Center for Entrepreneurship and Innovation at Marlborough delivers a superior college preparatory education in an environment imbued with high ethical values.

Here at Marlborough, we don’t just teach girls to keep pace with the changing future.

Instead, we teach them to boldly pursue ideas which set the pace for the future.


Your Next Steps

Want to learn more about the Marlborough experience?

Get in touch now.

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